Keywords For Misc (T-Z): Aristocracy, Election 2000, Honor and Integrity, Nepotism, Stupidity, Women's Rights

NICKNAMES: Right Wingers, Nazis, Fascists, Aristocrats, Fanatics, Zealots

Strom Thurmond Jr. (Nepotism, Aristocracy)

FACT: There's always nepotism. When Congress returns, Strom Thurmond Jr. will almost certainly be appointed to the post of U.S. Attorney, despite the fact that the 28-year-old is only three years out of law school. But his dad is the senior senator for South CarolinaSo what other credentials must one have to determine the fate of others.

Voter News Service (Election 2000) 

FACT: At a pollsters meeting in Montreal, the editorial director of Voter News Service (VNS) indicated that VNS is undertaking a massive review of its practices after what they now call "faulty exit projections" in Florida last year. Based on its exit polling, VNS had projected that Gore would win the state. Among their explanations: they didn't anticipate the Bush margin among absentee voters; they need a better model for dealing with votes outstanding; and they did not provide analysts with the "history of what's been going on through the night in close states and counties" (whatever that means). Unfortunately, they missed the one thing that would correctly explain their findings…the exit polls were right. It is widely agreed among independent sources that if all voters’ intents were recorded correctly and counted (as an exit poll would have done), Gore WON the state by between 15,000 and 30,000 votes had it not been for the butterfly ballot and other voting debacles. 

J.C. Watts (Aristocracy, Stupidity) 

FACT: Rep. Watts showed up at Will Rogers World Airport a few weeks ago, and proceeded to leave his car in an unattended loading zone out front. Unfortunately for Watts, since September 11, such an action has been deemed illegal. Indeed, Sergeant Edward Stupka wrote him a $15 ticket and Gentlemenly JC did what any respectable leader would do. He flew into a rage, took the ticket and stuffed it under Stupka's badge, telling him to "take care of it." Watts then continued to rant about airport security, and at one point allegedly used the word "bomb" (Note: People have been arrested and charged before 9/11 for using the word "bomb" at an airport). After discovering that the Oklahoman was going to run a story about the incident, Watts desperately tried to get in touch with Officer Stupka to apologize. Stupka was not interested. J.C. should be kissing ass since, if he wasn't a congressman and ex-football star, he would have been kissing the pavement before the second word of his rant spewed out of his mouth.

S. Vance Wilkins, Jr. (Honor and Integrity) 06/2002

FACT: It was revealed that Virginia's House Speaker S. Vance Wilkins Jr. paid $100,000 to stave off a sexual harrassment lawsuit. Since then a second woman has come forward and announced that Wilkins groped her a party six months ago. So finally, Wilkins has been forced to resign after GOP lawmakers finally crumbled and called for his job.

S. Vance Wilkins, Jr.  (Honor and Integrity) 06/2002

FACT: The Washington Post reported that the Speaker of the Virginia House of Delegates paid more than $100,000 to settle a sexual harassment claim filed by a 26-year-old woman who worked in the same building. The woman alleged that the 65-year old S. Vance Wilkins, Jr., had sexually accosted her several times, groping her and pinning her against office furniture. He then tried to keep her silent by telling her that nobody would possibly believe such a thing about the Speaker of the House. 

Chuck Yob (Woman's Rights, Stupidity)

FACT: According to Republican National Committeeman Chuck Yob of Michigan, the GOP is a strong supporter of women who run for elected office. In fact, Yob thinks they're particularly well suited to be secretary of state because "they like that kind of work." Our sources tell us that Yob was shocked to learn that secretary of state isn't actually secretarial work. "Well, then," he said, "perhaps they'd be better suited as nurse of state, housewife of state, or stewardess of state." Ha ha ha ha. That crazy GOP produces such clever Mysoginists!

MULTIPLE

Doug Dean, Bob Beauprez (Honor and Integrity)

FACT: Doug Dean, the Colorado House Speaker got into some hot water after breaking into his ex-girlfriend's house with a screwdriver. Last week police released 911 tapes which feature the ex-girlfriend, Gloria Sanak, shouting at the dispatcher and gasping for breath. Dean claims that he went to the house to pick up some clothes Sanak left outside for him but discovered she had not included his cell phone charger. So, he decided to bust out the screwdriver (that he just happened to have on his person) and break into her house. Bob Beauprez, state Republican chairman, saw little wrong with this criminal behavior when he said, "He made a mistake and says he made a mistake. Does it rise to the occasion of being unfit to serve? No."…But lying about a blowjob does. Right! 

COMMENT: Remember how on his first day in office George W. Bush made all his staffers promise that they must avoid even any appearance of impropriety if they were to return honor and integrity to the White House? Well…..

Crittenden, Lideen, Olson, and O'Beirne (Women's Rights, Stupidity)

FACT: Danielle Crittenden, Barbara Lideen, Barbara Olson, and Kate O'Beirne appeared in an article in Britain's Daily Telegraph to bemoan the rotten state of feminism in America. These four rich, privileged Republicans had the gall to ask America to "take back the vote - we've used it unwisely. We'd like to give it back to our husbands." They continued to explain that Bush would have won by a landslide if women hadn't been allowed to vote. This follow the same lardly-logic of the fatmaster himself, Rush "for the twinkies" Limbaugh who smartly pointed out that if Bush would have won by a landslide if blacks were not allowed to vote. Well, Rush, God knows Republicans attempted to do just that. The Florida disenfranchisement fiasco was but a small crumb on the racist GOP nazicake. 

COMMENT: This baffling desire to return to the stone ages is typical of the "Promise Keepers" cult of kooks who think women are effective only as maids, cooks, nannies and sexual objects. Me thinks they are in the minority, unfortunately, they are windbags of epic proportions with wealth to force their ideas on the unsuspecting populace. Read: Scaife, Coors, Moon, Murdoch.